Hold the mayo (close)

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I live for this stuff and ultimately I will die for this stuff. I know I'm not alone. Thanks to my food homie Dane for hooking me up with his own Nihon facts n figures - it is 70% fat and more than 30% of it is saturated fat. Its called Kyupi or "Kewpi". Some people just call it Japanese mayo. It says on the label something like 'for people 0-100'. Thats the most accurate packaging I've ever read in my life, although if I live to 101 the shits gonna go down. Big time.

Now I like food but I'm not one of those junk food activists anymore. I don't say 'the only rules are there are no rules'. I have instilled a couple of rules to my new doctrine - breakfast, a love affair with anti-oxidants, popping pills that wont make you cry in 2 days, everything in moderation including moderation (awesome moral loophole), lots of water (i reckon 70% of the worlds wars are caused from dehydration) and I keep my game pretty tight.

Until this 5 o'clock shadow, Jake from Melrose Place, leather jacket and high fat content condiment shows up.

I'll put the mutha f***er on anything. My all time favourite is on the chicken katsu curry for gods sake! If that isn't a Homer Simpson starter I dont know what is. Forget that thin, slathery, sour version that comes in jars or that talented mum whips up before dinner. That mayo is only good on iceberg lettuce in a desperate beach sandwich. (And iceberg lettuce. Come on, spinach kicked his ass at the sandwich grammys years ago). Paul Newman has done some good work with mayo - and NZ's ETA comes closest here in consistency... but it just doesnt have that sex for your mouth buzz that Japanese Mayo has.
This is the real (see fake) deal. I have so many bad ass weaknesses which may all get revealed here in some kind of culinary primal scream and this is my first. Lets just say I'm easing you in slowly.

Thanks to the additional input from other addicts here are some other tips for Kyupi, Kewpi, Japanese Mayo:

Mixed with tuna on pizza or in any sushi you make

With tomato and chutney on toast

Replace ketchup as your fish and chip accessory (is the part-Dutch Kamako Jam feeling me?)

Whatever to 1000 island dressing. Mix this with ketchup and go platinum.

With Beef on rice for a korean cuisine gone wild vibe

In any sandwich or Burger (another time)

As a dipping sauce for those raw vegetables begging to be degraded

Other notes, it comes with an optional attachment that makes the mayo look like a geometric flower when you pour it ala fancy cake icing. How many mayo's would do that for their fans?

Remember: I aint sayin Kyupi Mayo is perfect - but its perfect for me. If you down with the soft plastic bottle that collapses everytime you use it, hit me up.


    someone told me that kewpie is short for, or asian slang for cutie pie, can't remember when, can't remember who


    that is correct, young jedi:


    totally. after going to Japan for the first time I came back, bought a rice cooker and had perfect rice and kyupi mayo with EVRYTHING. including breakfast. somehow it seemed clean & sensible.
    as if that wasn't fattening enough, i got caught up in the first Jamie Oliver hype and starting using butter in dishes like there was no tomorrow.

    nowadays when i see those cutely packaged bars of pig fat in the supermarket i'm like "thanks but no thanks...but maybe later when I find the right recipe"

    have u tried the kyupi with karashi mustard already mixed inside? just avoid parsley flavour.


    PS Yes! the mayo on fries in Holland and Belgium might come very close to kyupi in terms of creaminess and fat saturation! and in Netherlands they have this really delicious fast food standard called a Frikandel Speciaal which is a deep fried sausage with ketchup, mayo and a sprinkle of chopped raw onions.

    I believe the Dutch are the world champions of seriously-unhealthy-but-good fast food.

    but i still feel that kyupi has a certain 'je ne sais quoi' (coco you got me hooked on these pseudo ironic quotation marks)


    to be honest ever since you fed me that packet flying fish roe japanese pasta sauce on italian pasta with shredded iceberg and lashing of kewpie in Melbourne I always keep a squeezy bottle at the ready. It adds nicely to our enourmous condiment collection....perhaps a blog post but at the moment our fridge is 50% condiments


    you need kewpie half

    "Over the years mayonnaise and salad dressings have become established as essential condiments in Japan's households. They have come to be used to season meat and fish dishes as well as salads, and their consumption increases year after year. One reason for this sustained growth has been that we have developed innovative products that reflect the needs of the times and created new markets through our continued research and improvement endeavors. Recent high-quality additions to the product line that have met with popularity due to their appeal to the discriminating taste of consumers include Kewpie Half, a product that delivers the same taste as original mayonnaise with half the calories"


    the thing i like about kewpie half is that it has pink instead of red on the packaging... bottle looks like baby formula or baby shampoo.


    kewpie half!! looks like baby shampoo!! pre-mixed with mustards! derived from cutie pie! justified labelling as 'bar of pig fat'.... here I was street slanging and i get an education - I love you guys. PS my iceberg lettuce diss discounted the shredded genre. Apologies to you and your families.


    When our supermarket started doing that teriyaki chicken on rice dish, I knew it was missing that "Baby Mayo". I only just recently took the time to actually read the label and what it's actually called but I think we'll stick to the more questionable 'Baby Mayo' label.


    it's so expensive but i hear it is amazing; you have just confirmed this for me!


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