The Trouble with Minibars, Or "There's a Demon Inside my Refrigerator"
Monday, 9 April 2007 by Hasselhoff'd
The illustrious minibar - such a persistently annoying bugger, that seems intent of stripping you of cash, by way of charging you rediculous prices for products of mediocre quality - all in the name of convenience.
You've been out all night and arrive back at your room, rather than waiting 40 minutes for piping hot room service you decide to spend the equivalent on a pack of oreos sitting in you minibar. What irrationality would grip a person to do such stupid things? Well our inability to wait that 40 minutes, and perhaps our preference to avoid any contact with humans i.e your in-room-dining server, nice as they are, sometimes you just want the food and don't want them to go through the rigorous routine that happens everytime they enter your room. I come to the point now where I just grab the food from the guy at the door, sign his check and then set up everything on my bed.
But then again I've spent almost 9 months in the past year living in various hotel rooms - so it might be an acquired state of derision.
Which leads me to the story of Mr David "don't hassle the hoff" Hasselhoff. After leaving alcohol rehab he conducted an interview, declaring to the world he'd never drink again - since Jesus had found him, or he'd found Jesus, I forget which.
Then the Hasselhoff checked into a local Marriott hotel and within no time at all - proceeded to attack the minibar, not just the snickers and peanuts, which would serve as garnish to his fantastic concoction; yes that's right, every 250ml bottle in the minibar was emptied into a bucket along with bottles of bud and shite red & white wine.
He was found the following day, lying in a pool of his own experiment by housekeeping.
Since this minibar incident, Hasselhoff has found himself being escorted from Wimbledon because of drunkenness and being refused from boarding a plane.
Minibars, it would seem are enough to melt anyones resolve - something hotels, have in mind when they decide to charge three times as much for a packet of oreos or a beer.
You've been out all night and arrive back at your room, rather than waiting 40 minutes for piping hot room service you decide to spend the equivalent on a pack of oreos sitting in you minibar. What irrationality would grip a person to do such stupid things? Well our inability to wait that 40 minutes, and perhaps our preference to avoid any contact with humans i.e your in-room-dining server, nice as they are, sometimes you just want the food and don't want them to go through the rigorous routine that happens everytime they enter your room. I come to the point now where I just grab the food from the guy at the door, sign his check and then set up everything on my bed.
But then again I've spent almost 9 months in the past year living in various hotel rooms - so it might be an acquired state of derision.
Which leads me to the story of Mr David "don't hassle the hoff" Hasselhoff. After leaving alcohol rehab he conducted an interview, declaring to the world he'd never drink again - since Jesus had found him, or he'd found Jesus, I forget which.
Then the Hasselhoff checked into a local Marriott hotel and within no time at all - proceeded to attack the minibar, not just the snickers and peanuts, which would serve as garnish to his fantastic concoction; yes that's right, every 250ml bottle in the minibar was emptied into a bucket along with bottles of bud and shite red & white wine.
He was found the following day, lying in a pool of his own experiment by housekeeping.
Since this minibar incident, Hasselhoff has found himself being escorted from Wimbledon because of drunkenness and being refused from boarding a plane.
Minibars, it would seem are enough to melt anyones resolve - something hotels, have in mind when they decide to charge three times as much for a packet of oreos or a beer.
welcome HE, great post. I used to do a similar thing when I was 12. I think all kids did. It said drink, which was made up of a small splash of every alcoholic drink in my parent's spirits cabinet was known around the school yard as rocket fuel. We'd turn up to parties, listen to some bobby brown and get wasted and make out. Ahhh those were the days. I remember drinking so much of the evil tonic once that I passed out in the pouring rain of a football field for a good 3 to 4 hours.
it's the marriot way
haha...
I had no idea about the Hasselhoff Experiment (thought it was the name of a band )
maybe that's why the German public left him behind and took Robbie Williams into their hearts instead!
the best minibar I've had was in Sao Paulo, it was nice to at least have the choice to pay through the nose for vitamin-chocolate milk, diet guarana champagne and diet cola lima.
Do they have any local specialities in the Mumbai minibars?
I understand your prefernce for no human contact entirely, why aren't all hotels run by robots and computers by now goddamn it. I personally prefer the impersonal touch, give me a number and leave me the hell alone....I know rich people who stay in five start aman hotels love the personal touch and a good old chat with the staff - it makes them feel 'in touch'. But for me, the common pleb, I would rather be handed my food through a slot in the door by a non speaking droid...
I guess that's what living a hotel does to you. I pity you